I have come to an important realization this week. With my focus on JOY and getting more of it into my life, I’ve noticed that the times I am the happiest are when I am in connection with other people.
Phone calls and laughing over a coffee or a glass of wine with a friend or family member have been balm to my soul. Add to that, deep conversation into the evening and feeling understood come close to the top of the list.
But the connection that goes deepest is the one I have with God and my world; knowing that in spite of it all, God knows me and loves me just the way I am, and He knows what is best for me.
Over the past six months I have belonged to an online fitness group led by none other than Bill Phillips. It has been wonderful to be taught via live video every day by a man I believe to be on the cutting edge of fitness and nutrition. There were about two hundred of us in the group from all over the world. Daily we posted sweaty selfies, accountability, and photos of our food. We encouraged each other, corrected each other and cheered each other on.
I became popular.
It was great! I am so grateful for that time and the goals I accomplished. I learned to feel good about myself; I lost some weight and gained muscle as well as more energy. Most importantly, the illnesses that had plagued me for the past two years disappeared. I was pretty happy about all that.
I became more popular.
But then something happened. I realized that I was spending more and more tme on facebook watching live videos, doing the workouts and interacting with the group. I noticed that I was less present in my here-and-now world and more present with my new online friends. I noticed an emptiness creep into my life and when I finally pinpointed it, I disconnected from the online group.
I was not popular anymore.
Lest you think this was easy, let me tell you, it was akin to getting out of the religious cult I was in for twenty one years, although on a much smaller basis.
All of a sudden there is a big void in my life that I feel I have to fill.
But do I have to fill it?
Can I just be happy to let God direct my next steps? Can I be still and just let it happen?
I think I can, and I will do it. I will rest in the peace and joy that, when the time for the right thing comes into my life, I will be ready and waiting.
Remember, you can’t fill a cup that is already filled with good things but maybe not the best things for you. Sometimes you have to empty the cup a little in order to be filled with other, more meaningful things.
So now I am waiting.